Life in Pennsylvania
Bliss is definitely not the right word but my post-relationship life is not turning out so bad. Since returning from Aiken, Leo has settled in at Flying Horse Farm once again. He really is more settled at Becca's place than any other farm he's been at besides Sally's farm in Aiken. The farm is not large - about 13 acres. There are about 20 horses and lots of lessons so there is a lot of activity. I actually think Leo is better when everything is confined and he can see everything that is going on.
I got the chance to take Leo to Valley Forge National Park to do some fitness work, which was fun for the first 45 minutes of the ride. Leo just reaches a point mentally where he can't settle down anymore. After several trot sets and one gallop, he couldn't stop jigging and stressing about everything. The couple-mile walk back to the trailer was not fun for me.
Prepping for the Prelim Move-Up!
Sally recommend we move up to Prelim at Plantation Horse Trials on June 7! We're running training at Morven, Plantation and MCTA before then. We've spent a solid 2 years at training which maybe more than most people need, but Leo's my first training level horse and will be my first prelim horse. I'm taking every opportunity to get as much experience at training level as I can. I want to be successful out of the gate at Prelim. And right now, training fences look and feel small which is an awesome feeling! We're both feeling super confident.
Our lessons with Becca are going really well and Becca is honing in on technical questions that we'll see at prelim: related, bending lines with skinnies and severely, awkward bending lines like a 2 stride bending line which has to be the hardest thing I have ever ridden. Leo is super confident and game right now so even if he doesn't get his eye on the fence until the very last possible second, he still jumps it rather than running out which is an awesome feeling. During my own jump schools I am just practicing cantering simple 3'6" courses to keep working on my eye. And yes, I measure those fences and make sure they are prelim height!
On the flat, it's all sitting trot for me! Ugh! Becca is working on getting me to settle Leo by squeezing the crap out of him with my upper calves. The idea is to hold and contain his energy with my legs, rather than use my hands. It works but it is so much harder than just using my hands - hah! We're introducing more lateral work to get Leo to relax and engage his back - shoulder-in to haunches in on a circle. He hates this. His canter work is really improving quite a lot since Sally made a point of telling me it was his weakest gait so I needed to do a lot of my flatwork at the canter. Lengthenings are still not there for me though Sally made progress with him in that area herself. Damn long-backed horses!
Guilt-free Living!
One of the clear benefits of not being in a relationship, is that my time is once again 100% mine to do with it what I want. I don't have to consult anyone else. I feel no guilt when I spend hours at the barn now. In fact, I can spend the entire day there if I want to! I no longer have to rush around and so if I can get everything done in the shortest amount of time possible in order to avoid complaints and angry remarks back at home. No more explaining myself and my priorities! If I want to go to Aiken for a couple of weeks; I just budget for it. I don't have to think about how I am going to "sell it" to my uninvolved significant other.
I also no longer feel that intense disappointment when my significant other fails yet again to show any sign of interest or engagement with my passion. I'd be at competitions and Mike would never text or call or make any effort to inquire as to how things were going. Yes, occasionally he would come to a competition and I loved that. But there was no daily engagement in my riding life. It always hurt to know that riding created an odd loneliness in my relationship.
The reality now is that after a great ride or a successful competition - or even after a frustrating ride, I have no one to come home to and talk about it with. Not that Mike ever wanted to hear about it! I guess that's the gap Facebook friends can fill. My coworkers are even talking about coming out to a competition to see me ride! A couple of the guys at work are in bands and we go out to support them. We're trying to find ways of supporting everyone - there are only 6 of us after all. It's like a second family in many ways.
Twenty Years in the Making...
It's pretty crazy to think that I am finally ready for Prelim. This has been my life goal since I was 16. Twenty years later and I am right at the cusp of making it a reality. It is truly amazing. And what's even more amazing, is if I want to go further than prelim, all signs indicate Leo is more than capable. That horse is the greatest gift. It has not been an easy road, and god, can he be such a dickhead, but the payoff is going to be insanely good.
I got the chance to take Leo to Valley Forge National Park to do some fitness work, which was fun for the first 45 minutes of the ride. Leo just reaches a point mentally where he can't settle down anymore. After several trot sets and one gallop, he couldn't stop jigging and stressing about everything. The couple-mile walk back to the trailer was not fun for me.
Prepping for the Prelim Move-Up!
Sally recommend we move up to Prelim at Plantation Horse Trials on June 7! We're running training at Morven, Plantation and MCTA before then. We've spent a solid 2 years at training which maybe more than most people need, but Leo's my first training level horse and will be my first prelim horse. I'm taking every opportunity to get as much experience at training level as I can. I want to be successful out of the gate at Prelim. And right now, training fences look and feel small which is an awesome feeling! We're both feeling super confident.
Our lessons with Becca are going really well and Becca is honing in on technical questions that we'll see at prelim: related, bending lines with skinnies and severely, awkward bending lines like a 2 stride bending line which has to be the hardest thing I have ever ridden. Leo is super confident and game right now so even if he doesn't get his eye on the fence until the very last possible second, he still jumps it rather than running out which is an awesome feeling. During my own jump schools I am just practicing cantering simple 3'6" courses to keep working on my eye. And yes, I measure those fences and make sure they are prelim height!
On the flat, it's all sitting trot for me! Ugh! Becca is working on getting me to settle Leo by squeezing the crap out of him with my upper calves. The idea is to hold and contain his energy with my legs, rather than use my hands. It works but it is so much harder than just using my hands - hah! We're introducing more lateral work to get Leo to relax and engage his back - shoulder-in to haunches in on a circle. He hates this. His canter work is really improving quite a lot since Sally made a point of telling me it was his weakest gait so I needed to do a lot of my flatwork at the canter. Lengthenings are still not there for me though Sally made progress with him in that area herself. Damn long-backed horses!
Guilt-free Living!
One of the clear benefits of not being in a relationship, is that my time is once again 100% mine to do with it what I want. I don't have to consult anyone else. I feel no guilt when I spend hours at the barn now. In fact, I can spend the entire day there if I want to! I no longer have to rush around and so if I can get everything done in the shortest amount of time possible in order to avoid complaints and angry remarks back at home. No more explaining myself and my priorities! If I want to go to Aiken for a couple of weeks; I just budget for it. I don't have to think about how I am going to "sell it" to my uninvolved significant other.
I also no longer feel that intense disappointment when my significant other fails yet again to show any sign of interest or engagement with my passion. I'd be at competitions and Mike would never text or call or make any effort to inquire as to how things were going. Yes, occasionally he would come to a competition and I loved that. But there was no daily engagement in my riding life. It always hurt to know that riding created an odd loneliness in my relationship.
The reality now is that after a great ride or a successful competition - or even after a frustrating ride, I have no one to come home to and talk about it with. Not that Mike ever wanted to hear about it! I guess that's the gap Facebook friends can fill. My coworkers are even talking about coming out to a competition to see me ride! A couple of the guys at work are in bands and we go out to support them. We're trying to find ways of supporting everyone - there are only 6 of us after all. It's like a second family in many ways.
Twenty Years in the Making...
It's pretty crazy to think that I am finally ready for Prelim. This has been my life goal since I was 16. Twenty years later and I am right at the cusp of making it a reality. It is truly amazing. And what's even more amazing, is if I want to go further than prelim, all signs indicate Leo is more than capable. That horse is the greatest gift. It has not been an easy road, and god, can he be such a dickhead, but the payoff is going to be insanely good.
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