Rocking and Rolling into 2013

It's funny, but this past year I've really come to appreciate what a mental game riding is.  Leo's been a real challenge for me and I have had one hell of a time trying to figure out our relationship. It doesn't help that relationships have never been my strength - unless it was with a cat. I'm awesome at feline relationships.

cats!

We started off the year in a bad way. Every ride was a battleground on which Leo and I stood; not speaking the same language, unable to come to resolution. I did a lot of experimenting and we've made steady progress throughout the year. Rather than constantly worrying about when things would fall apart again or if I would ever be able to ride him well, I learned to focus on Leo's strengths - which go beyond being a good jumper and galloper. He's also honest, forgiving and super intelligent. And he never holds my mistakes against me. The mental game changed for me when I learned how to use this knowledge of Leo to counteract my self-doubt.

It really hit me in the face in a xc lesson this fall with Courtney. I was micro-managing again and Leo was refusing. Courtney stopped me and pointed out that I have to remember he wants to do this. He knows his job. I had to have some trust in him and let him "rock and roll." For a split second, I thought to myself, yet again, 'I'm never going to be able to ride this horse.' But another part of me immediately kicked in. "What am I thinking?? I can and I do ride this horse."

I took faith in Leo (Yes, Leo is like a religion). Yea, he doesn't listen well and he'll make mistakes, but he'll do his damn best to get us to the other side of the fence and he'll kick on to the next fence un-phased. I don't need perfection or complete control. In reality, it's his athleticism which will get us out of a sticky situation, not me and my opinion. So I let Leo rock and roll and our lesson completely turned around. Each competition since that lesson has been the best of my life.

Moving forward, I know now to answer my voice of self-doubt with a much more confident "Let's rock and roll!" This is Leo's language and it serves us much better than my own.

Leo is growing up

Yes, he's going on 10, so this might sound strange, but I'm happy to report that Leo has really grown up this year. He's much more professional at events, though he is still managed with a regimen of calming supplements. At Plantation, I eliminated one of the supplements and he was quite good! He has not had a freak out before xc all year. No running sideways or backwards and spinning, which happened several times in 2011. Very little screaming and carrying on when other horses come and go. 

His only freakouts of the year were at the Lucinda Green and Rebecca Howard clinics where he had to do a lot of waiting and standing, so I'm a little wary of clinics now. But then I didn't manage him with calming supplements which, in hindsight, I should have. We had one freak out the first time I rode him in the xc field at AOPF too, but overall the freak outs are few and far between! I have also ridden through them so many times now they don't intimidate me as much. 

At home, Leo no longer kicks the wall when he eats his grain, which is nice. But he's developed some new odd habits to replace the ones he's lost. He likes to buck on the lead when I take him out to the pasture or when I lead him to the trailer. He will also start weaving when I show up at the barn and am slow to get him out of his stall. Oh Leo. 

I'm changing too...

I'm a much more proactive rider and owner now, in comparison to 12 months ago. For the first time in my life, I took 100% responsibility for what was happening with my horse this year, rather than relying on someone else to tell me what to do. I listened to my gut and made some dramatic changes early on. I got all new bits for Leo and started working with a different trainer.  I doubted myself at first, but it was absolutely the best thing I could have done for us.

I'm getting better at reading courses, thanks in part to my friend, Jen. At Loch Moy, I found the 1-stride bank complex a little intimidating. Jen pointed out that the bank drop earlier in the course sets the horses up for success at the bank complex. Jen's also good at recognizing aspects of courses that test a horse's education - like how they use left and right turns at different points and for different purposes in the course. Now when I walk a cross, I actually think about how each fence relates to the other.

I'm getting more strategic with my warm-ups. If there are angled fences on course, I'm aware now that I have to practice them in warm-up.  Seems obvious, but sometimes I just want the warm-up to be forward and positive, but the angles keep Leo sharp and listening.

My goal for next year is simple: spend 2013 gaining more training level experience. 

More than anything, I just want to enjoy my time at training now - I've never been here before and I'm having so much more fun than I have before. There are several things I want to work on. My brain turns to mush in stadium so I want to get more comfortable in that realm. I want to improve my accuracy, tighten up my lines and ride more forward through my turns. I want to improve Leo's straightness - both on the flat and over fences. The list never ends, right?

My friend Tavy pointed out that we both have horses of a lifetime right now. She's absolutely right! I'm sure next year will have plenty of ups and downs just like this year, but I'm looking forward to seeing how the story continues to unfold.